Thursday, September 10, 2009

This One Crosses Over Whole

Mystery of Two, Filmstrip, and All Dinosaurs are playing a show at The Happy Dog and they've asked me to be involved in some capacity, dealing art and zines. I've got the opportunity to possibly go on tour in a week with Cave Bear so I'm going to use this as a trial run of setting up and holding down my merch table. If I have any kinks to iron out, now's the time before I'm out there in distant landscapes, fighting for my life. The other way in which I am involved is that I'm making a limit print of the image from this poster available exclusive to this show. So if you come and donate to get in, you can get a print for free.

Speaking of fighting for my life, let me tell you a little bit about this piece. I have a pretty close friend that recently lost a loved one, a Grandfather. I have no license to write about it, but know that I could feel how hard it's been. It wasn't sudden, this passing took a while. However, he was an old man. An old man that had lived a long, full life.

I've got my own long familiar history with death. My Father's Father died over a long period of not taking care of himself when I was just a pup. I was there and saw this happen. This was not a good death. It was the beginning, and since then I've lost great friends and seen epic stories end way before they should. I've been in the room when the time was called. I, myself, have been to the shores of the river so many times. I'm not saying that for dramatic effect, it's just the way it is. In 30 years I've lived harsh enough to come close to dying a multitude of times. I'm not done here yet, so I haven't crossed over, but I've been there.

Which brings me to the point. This piece isn't for the dead. This piece is for you, the living. The people on this side of the river who need to understand that crossing over isn't the end. Leaving this world for the next is another journey to take. That when you've spent your time here as well as you can, you cross over whole. I'm not a religious guy, if I believe in anything it's ancient and forgotten. My magic, as strong as I thought it was, has been failing me, and others, left and right lately. I still feel like I've grown to understand parts of the universe, and maybe this is one of those parts.

One of the fundamental truths I definitely understand is that everything is fragile and temporary. That the world, as absolutely majestic and heart-pounding-ly spectacular as it is, is a very very dangerous place. No one is ever promised that they'll get to follow through and finish what they started. We're all on borrowed time. I've know this since I was 16, when I shattered my spine. I don't take things for granted anymore. I try not to let things slip through my fingers. Sometimes, it can not be helped. My response has been to brace up, and develop a keener awareness and stronger grip. Try harder. Be better.

I've been Time Traveling a lot lately. Spending time in possible futures. It's been hard to come back to the present. There's bad futures and worse futures and really really amazing futures filled of epic awesomeness. It's not entirely up to me which future will manifest. I'm now here in the present, though.

For my part I'm going to try as hard as I can, with what possibly little time and weak magic as I've got, to steer everything towards the amazing, towards the epic. That way, even if I fail, when I eventually do finally cross over... I'll cross over whole.


Chirsta said...

You are an amazing person.

John G said...

Thank You, but... really, I'm just a dude. Nothing more.

Nicoriley said...

John, not only is this my favorite drawing of yours to date, and am honered to have it grace a flyer for both my bands, but what you just wrote about it, is to date the best explanation of my life and what I hope to achieve wig it, that I have ever read. We need to work magic more often, 'cause your a silly dude, your magic's not weak, it's just working so well it can't be bothered to stop and tell you what it's done. When that wave comes, you won't even recognize it as one of your own. Kinda like hat letter to the editor. John G has weak magic? Please.

See ya tommorow.


John G said...

Thanks Nick. This note made me feel pretty good about things. Tomorrow night should be great!

danielle said...

really inspiring post - your comment: "...No one is ever promised that they'll get to follow through and finish what they started. We're all on borrowed time...." - well, i try to remind myself that the joy and reward is in the attempt at something, the action, not the result or completion, necessarily. I mean, every time i reach the end of some project, i am either sad its over, or thinking about the next thing, the next action anyway...i'd like to live more in the day, in the activity of attempt and action....i don't know, it just seems futile to try to predict future awesomeness when i could just relish in the awesomeness of right now...and right now, its gorgeous out and i may be working, but i get to read cool shit like this and chat with people walking into my store all day, and really...that's kinda awesome.